Showing posts with label lists. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lists. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Top 20 things I’ve learned (or that has sunk in) since my last birthday


1)      Life is short AND precious. Make each moment count
2)      You REALLY are the company you keep (thanks dad)
3)      I’m ok not being perfect 
4)      I can only do what I can do (not what someone else can do or has done or wants me to do)
5)      This life really isn’t about me (it’s about what I can do for others to make OUR existance a lil less painful)
6)      I have choices regardless of how much I like or dislike those choices 
7)      That I don’t have to answer a text/email/phone call RIGHT THIS MINUTE
8)      That sometimes “it” just doesn’t matter
9)      That I don’t care that it’s “not your monkey, not your circus” 
10)   That the heart still hurts when someone dies no matter how many loved ones have passed previously or that death is inevitable 
11)   That while I LOVE to make lists, I don’t always like to check things off those lists
12)   That the “apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” (and it ain’t all bad!)
13)   That sometimes all I got is FAITH and that sometimes I need to have faith for others as well
14)   That prayer really does work (so be careful what you pray for!)
15)   That I’ve forgotten how to dream 
16)   That tomorrow doesn’t have to be scary
17)   That forgiving isn’t always easy but it is necessary (more for you the forgiver than the one you are to forgive)
18)   Just because I’ve “screwed up” previously doesn’t make me a bad or stupid person. Just means I’m human
19)   That when I’m “feeling crazy”…it might NOT be me! Might actually be someone else that’s crazy trying to make me feel crazy
20)   That I’m allowed to have the feelings I have about things (I think it’s called “being an individual”) and I don’t owe anyone an apology because of it

Sunday, August 25, 2013

predictable

I'll just come out and say it-I'm predictable. Or at least I feel predictable. I dream big but do very little to follow thru.  I make "goals" and "To do lists"; get tools to move forward to make the changes I desire.  I even look for peeps who share similar desire for change or whom do what it is I wish to do in hopes of drawing strength and inspiration.  I follow "them" (changes) for a spell and then "sha zam" I've fallen off the "change" wagon.

And evidently, I'm also not a multi-tasker.  Because heaven forbid I could work on "changing" more than one thing at a time. And this time round I'm not even sure I really care that I'm leaning towards falling off the change wagon. again.  Maybe I like using excuses to get out of things.  Maybe I like being limited. Maybe the real problem is that I lack discipline and have no desire for discipline. I think. Maybe I'm just lazy. How the hell does one figure this crap out?

Maybe I like who I am; like the pace that I am going at in life. I'm not in a bad position in life. and I'm not really back pedaling (except with spending/paying off things). Everything I do typically is for a specific purpose. Granted I'm not "outwardly" an overly happy person but I contribute that to the fact that my brain NEVER shuts off. I'm always thinking; even in my sleep. and if I'm always thinking about things I sometimes forget to smile and just plain have fun.

I love reading books. I love self help books. I love teaching/showing people new ways of doing things or that I know a lot of information. I also love being alone but I do occasionally like to hang out with others doing things. I"m pretty resourceful and creative. But I just can't find a creative way to love exercise. at least not right now. I always feel like "go go go" but truthfully if you were to have me write down all the things I do you would see that I actually have plenty of  time to work in exercise and some fun exercise.  

Do written schedules really work? How do you retrain yourself to love being up verse going back to bed (especially when you really don't need the sleep)? I was reading the other day that if you want to change a bad habit to a good habit that you should start small... But what's starting small? and goals...how are goal lists made? I would assume that my goals are too broad (pay off credit card) but not sure how to "narrow it down"?

maybe I'm just confused about what I should be doing.  wouldn't be the first time.