Wednesday, March 25, 2015

If you're not learning, you're still not living!

LOL…I don’t know why I even bother creating elaborate lists of “things I’d like to accomplish” (like the 101 things to do in 1001 days).  Maybe I should just have a “generic” list and call it the “today this sounds like something I’d like to do but no pressure”. Or just have a “bucket list” with a disclaimer that “if you don’t achieve this it’s ok; just have fun with whatever you decide to do”. Oh well, whatever. I’m ok, it’s just a list. Life is full of endless possibilities for me.

I AM VERY grateful for the progress I am making with myself since the first of the year.  I decided this was the year to “happy healthy firm and confident”.  No, not firm as in “rock solid body” but firm as in “when I make a decision stand behind it; no apologies”.  I have a right to feel, I have a right to put me first, I have a right to be happy too!  I need to be confident in myself and firm in the decisions I make no matter what the projected outcome looks like. I know what’s best for me. 

Which brings me to the fact that I applied for a position in London UK. Secretly I’m ecstatic at the thought of working overseas for a few years. But I know that if I do get chosen for the position that a few hard decisions will need to be made that will affect more than just me. Whatever is meant to be will be; I have to keep FAITH that God hears my hearts’ desires just as he hears my fears.  He has always had my back…I’m very fortunate.

Ok back to the list….I will say that it has inspired me to be more active. I am a lil more flexible and I’m saying yes to things I wouldn’t normally do (the Sexy Back Chair dance class was SO MUCH FUN. I’m actually surprised at how much fun I had). But most of the “Profession Related” items are null and void.  I started taking a meditation class and the books I’ve been reading on “finding your passion” started sinking in and I finally admitted openly that I am not an “natural born sales person” and most importantly that I have no desire to learn how to be a sales person. I just want to be happy.  I want to be healthy. I want to enjoy life and pursue things that “feel natural”. Pimping products isn’t natural to me…artistic projects ARE natural to me.