LOL…I don’t know why I even bother creating elaborate lists
of “things I’d like to accomplish” (like the 101 things to do in 1001 days). Maybe I should just have a “generic” list and
call it the “today this sounds like something I’d like to do but no pressure”. Or
just have a “bucket list” with a disclaimer that “if you don’t achieve this it’s
ok; just have fun with whatever you decide to do”. Oh well, whatever. I’m ok,
it’s just a list. Life is full of endless possibilities for me.
I AM VERY grateful for the progress I am making with myself since
the first of the year. I decided this
was the year to “happy healthy firm and confident”. No, not firm as in “rock solid body” but firm
as in “when I make a decision stand behind it; no apologies”. I have a right to feel, I have a right to put
me first, I have a right to be happy too!
I need to be confident in myself and firm in the decisions I make no
matter what the projected outcome looks like. I know what’s best for me.
Which brings me to the fact that I applied for a position in
London UK. Secretly I’m ecstatic at the thought of working overseas for a few
years. But I know that if I do get chosen for the position that a few hard
decisions will need to be made that will affect more than just me. Whatever is
meant to be will be; I have to keep FAITH that God hears my hearts’ desires
just as he hears my fears. He has always
had my back…I’m very fortunate.
Ok back to the list….I will say that it has inspired me to
be more active. I am a lil more flexible and I’m saying yes to things I wouldn’t
normally do (the Sexy Back Chair dance class was SO MUCH FUN. I’m actually
surprised at how much fun I had). But most of the “Profession Related” items
are null and void. I started taking a
meditation class and the books I’ve been reading on “finding your passion” started
sinking in and I finally admitted openly that I am not an “natural born sales
person” and most importantly that I have no desire to learn how to be a sales
person. I just want to be happy. I want
to be healthy. I want to enjoy life and pursue things that “feel natural”.
Pimping products isn’t natural to me…artistic projects ARE natural to me.
